Presidential Chatroom 08-13-08 – Olympics, Georgia, and Obama

Presidential Chatroom 08-13-08 – Olympics, Georgia, and Obama

Condi_Ricecakes: Where is he already? I have a hair appointment in two hours!

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: He’ll be here Condi, relax. You’ll have plenty of time…

Secret_Serviceman has entered the chatroom

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: See, here it comes now.

Secret_Serviceman: I have entered the chatroom, and will ensure there are no possible attackers.

Secret_Serviceman: Ok. Area is clear, we’re a go for the President.

W_Bushie: Hehehe, Here I am everyone. Don’t panic.

Condi_Ricecakes: It’s OK Mr President, but we’ve told you before that you don’t have to send a secret serviceman into a chat room… it’s not a real room, and really possesses no danger.

W_Bushie: Oh, don’t be silly little lady… You can never be too careful. But I do love these new chats; I can pretend to workimacate right from my bedroom. Hehehe.

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: You mean you CAN work from your bedroom, not pretend to… oh nevermind. We’ve got a lot to discuss today sir, we should get right to it.

W_Bushie: Alrighty-tighty. Let’s hop to it then Dickey.

Condi_Ricecakes: Well first sir, we should discuss this situation in Georgia. It seems Russia has claimed a cease-fire, but Georgia’s president is still reporting new attacks.

W_Bushie: Well, it’s like I said before, I’m in full support of Georgia. I love everything about it. The peaches, the Atlanta Falcon, Cartoon Network – all some of my favorite things. But since when did they get their own President?

Condi_Ricecakes: Sir. Wait. You think Russia has attacked Georgia, the STATE?

W_Bushie: Well DUH Condi, don’t you read the news? Hehehe, it’s not like there is a country named Georgia! Geez Dickey, don’t you think Condi here needs to learn some Geomagraphy?

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: Uhh. Mr President – why don’t we let Mr. Gates handle that one, OK?

W_Bushie: Good idea. Bobby’s a good boy. What’s next?

Condi_Ricecakes: Well, the Olympics are in full swing; Michael Phelps won yet another gold medal, making him the world record holder at 11!

W_Bushie: Well then we should give him another one.

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: Another one sir?

W_Bushie: Another gold medal Big Time. I mean, my motto has always been, “help those that already have enough”, and this kid has got so many gold medals, we might as well just give him another one, or maybe two.

Condi_Ricecakes: Sir, we can’t just give him medals. I mean, he has to win them! You have to EARN them!

W_Bushie: Ring ring, hello? Oh who’s this? It’s my Presidential Campaign from 2000 calling! He says that you’re dead wrong Condi. Hehehehe.

Condi_Ricecakes: Ok. Fine. I get your point. I’ll mark down to see if we can’t give him another gold medal. Now last on today’s agenda, lots of reports out about Obama talking about our policies and people are looking for an official response from the White House.

W_Bushie: Well, let’s just tell them we’re doing everything we can to track down these terrorists, so they don’t track us down here at home.

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: No no sir, not Osama Bin Laden… Barack Obama, the Democratic Nominee for President?

W_Bushie: The Democrats have nominated a Terrorist? Sneaky. Why didn’t we think of that Dickey? I mean, a terrorist as president can probably find all them other terrorists hiding in the desert. Boy that really frosts my cornflakes.

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: Why don’t you lie down sir, we’ll talk it from here.

W_Bushie: Good idea Quasimodo. I need to get some restimifcation.

W_Bushie has left the chatroom.

Condi_Ricecakes: Ok, so on the Obama thing, do what we always do?

Dick_Buckshot_Cheney: Yep – Tell some staffer to say something ridiculous and then fire him.