Finalist in June/July 2008 Humorpress.com humor writing contest.
This blog is a collection of blogs and twitters from the secret underground celebrity internet. Sure, you've never heard of it because you're NOT a celebrity. Rest assured that these are totally real, although I do have to mention that they are actually fake, and this thing is 100% fiction, and that this entire blog is for entertainment purposes only.
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Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Live From The Jolie Wombpage

BetImOut1st – So it's, what, day 67 in here?

QTRthanShyShy – Seriously, didn't we just get created? Why's everyone freaking out about us?

BetImOut1st – I bet mom's some kind of weird freak or something. Or Dad's a vampire!

QTRthanShyShy – what's a vampire?

BetImOut1st – I don't know, but I always hear Dad going on and on about some "movie he was in" with some short, crazy guy? I have no idea…



QTRthanShyShy – …I'm trying to tune it out 'till we get there…

BetImOut1st – …I think Mom might actually be some kind of monster with a tail, so I'm sure we're going to get eaten. We should probably hold up in here a few more weeks to be sure.

QTRthanShyShy – I doubt she's a monster; we look normal.

BetImOut1st – compared to what? Each other? We're twins, numbnuts.

QTRthanShyShy – At least I've got nuts.

BetImOut1st – That's the best you can do? How old are you?

QTRthanShyShy – Bite me, why don't you just stay on your side of the womb. …ha! Womb! Get it? Like room?

BetImOut1st – I hate you.

QTRthanShyShy – Oh grow a sense of humor. Since the rest of you seems stunted…

BetImOut1st – hey what's with your lips? They take up half your face.

QTRthanShyShy – what?

BetImOut1st – Seriously, it's like God punched you in the mouth. Remind me to thank him.

QTRthanShyShy – You're such an as…

BetImOut1st – astounding person? I know, you should be grateful to be in my presence.

QTRthanShyShy – whatever! you spawned off of me!

BetImOut1st – prove it fishface!

QTRthanShyShy – oh shut up.

BetImOut1st – gladly…..

*45-seconds-of-silence-between-them*

QTRthanShyShy – …Wanna kick her bladder?

BetImOut1st – you really are my twin!

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All articles are ©2008 by their respective authors; AJ, Jason Campbell, Gail Dull, Nathan V or R.M.Thompson